Photos Only

Sophia and Max at OSU Hockey Game. Max is the son of Major Michael Draper and we met as a family readiness group for an evening out. Sophia was totally overstimulated by the loud music, OSU band, white hockey floor & all the lovely FRG mom's who wanted to hold her.

Jerry running a race. Looks pretty fit huh......

Flu + Epiphany

No Mom, I did not get my flu shot. It has NOT been part of my Emergency Daily To Do List. Getting a Flu shot from the pharmacist just seems a little weird.

This is what my to do list has been renamed. It has been elevated to "Emergency Only" to do list. As I mentioned earlier I am overwhelmed by my To Do list that it feels the only tasks that I can complete are Emergencies.

So yes, since I did not listen to my mom I was hit hard by the flu bug Thursday night. However, I must say that the bug patiently waited until I finished watching "Grey's Anatomy". As I headed off to bed, I felt a ache in my tummy that did not seem normal. A couple hours later and many runs to the bathroom I had successfully removed any thing left in my stomach. I was so lucky, as I did not wake Sophia through the night, in fact I did not even need to touch her. I called Rosie my next door neighbor around 7:00am and asked her to come take Sophia out of her crib and feed her some breakfast. Then my Nanny Sabrina came and whisked her away to her home for the day. I then called in Sister n law reinforcement and Sylvia met Sabrina 1/2 way to care for her while I slept and recovered from the truck that hit me. It's now Sunday and I am feeling better. Aunt Jennifer will be bringing back Sophia tonight and watching her on Monday while her Nanny takes the day off. Thanks to friends, neighbors, employees, family for their help.

Is anyone watching a show called Crash? It's on Friday nights on Starz channel. It stars Dennis Hopper and some other very attractive cast members. Very interesting show about LA.

So my Epiphany.... On Wednesday, my Nanny called in sick "short notice" and I had to take the day off. I went into work with Sophia to collect my laptop and tech packs that needed to be built during Sophia's nap and after bed time. Sophia was not the most patient lady and she stuck out like a soar thumb, but everyone tolerated her and said she was adorable, etc. The Epiphany hit me later in the day and here is what it is......

I am okay not keeping up with the Jones at A&F. I am okay finding a less paying, 40 hour work week job. I am willing to make a career sacrifice in order to have a better personal/family life. So now that I have come to terms with this feeling, now I need to find what that new career/job is. I am getting closer. Still not there. The court reporting thing is still in my back mind.....

I love Sophia but it has be SO NICE not caring for her this weekend. I honestly don't think I could of done it.

Happy Haloween

Fall

So, I have really struggled to keep this blog thing moving. Here are a couple excuses. Work is still horrendous. I have become overwhelmed with completing tasks. Anger bug came back.

This little bug is a poisonous fella. It bites me mostly on the weekends....

Grandma Grove came to visit. I worked my mom to the bone. Every night, I had personal plans and it was nice to loosen the noose around my neck. I had drinks with girlfriends attended my friends Ron/Judy's wedding. I even ballroom danced with my friends. GG only powered down the TV, Home Lights once. Thankfully, it was not during Grey's Anatomy. She was a great help and seems to manage Sophia and completing tasks effortlessly. GG sang over and over to Sophia "This Little Light of Mine" and taught her how to hold up her finger like a candle. Too cute. Thanks mom for your help!

Above are a few photos from last Saturday Military Fall Picnic. We went to a local pumpkin farm as a Military Family Group. It's always great to catch up with the other moms and see what they are up too, how they are feeling. Did the angry bug bite them???? It also amazes me that the group attendance is so small. I am surprised that more people are not involved. There are probably a lot of military families out there that are feeling all alone. Or maybe they are busy?? The events are free, so it's not like there is cost involved. I am perplexed by the lack of attendance.

The word on the street is that Jerry will be home by Christmas. As my neighbor Bill said to me.... Tiffanie, if you were running a marathon you are at the last mile. I thought this was a good analogy. Of course this little pep talk was after a few frustrated words out of my mouth.....

Jerry and I talk daily. He calls me on my way to work as they have a 15 minute moral phone line. He says it's still really hot and everyone is anxious to get home. He has been watching OSU/Browns football games. He just turned 34 & we celebrated our anniversary.

I just got my absentee ballot. Can't wait to vote and make a CHANGE!

Falling off the band wagon

Sophia with her Nanny's Toothbrush

Did I say that right? Do people really fall off the band wagon? Am I pronouncing/spelling that right?

Well anyway, I have completely fallen off the blog road. It's a combo of a few things... Works still is crazy, adjusting to being a single parent again, loss of power and a couple crazy weekends planned.

I went out to California to visit some dear friends Paula and Jim Wheelock. As usual, they showed me a great time. They are such a passionate couple and I love being around their energy. My heart ached for Sophia for ummmmmm lets say 2 minutes but then I walked around free as a bird remembering my singleton days and cherished every moment that I was free from parenting. Thanks Cindy & Jennifer for watching Sophia.

My dear friend Trisha & her 8 month old daughter Kiera came to visit from Ames, Iowa. It was so good to see Trisha and catch up. I would like to say that our daughters behaviors were something to be desired. Kiera was out of sorts and Sophia was whiny! We did have a couple laughs and shared a bottle of wine each night after our daughters screamed bloody murder for 30 minutes before drifting onto la la land. Ha Ha! Trisha gave me the best gift.... She watched Sophia while I ran ALONE. You don't know how much I miss running and exercising alone. So much that I think I will once again hire another babysitter so I can go running. What's another $20.00 a week.

Can you tell the anger is creeping back?

Sophia is doing great! She is sooooo funny! She takes everything she can (telephone, sippy cup, TV control) and puts it to her shoulder and pretends she is talking into the phone. Sometimes, she has very passionate conversations where her voice raises. She is running everywhere and quite happy to pounce on the cats. Sophia is very curious and loves to sit on the front step. Pulling out the tooth brush makes her smile and glee.

Jerry is also doing good. They are getting ready for their replacements. It's still very hot. He is counting down the days, as I am sure all of them are.

I know who I am going to vote for.... Do you?????

End of August Already???

How is it possibly the end of August? Every once in a while, I dream of the benefits of being a teacher and having the summers free. Then, the "back to school blues" seed is planted in my stomach on July 4th that grows into full bloom by the middle of August and I can't wait to rid my belly of this sadness. I do have severe "Back To School" issues. Even though my corporate job can be mundane and long, I can't deal with the low of going back to school.

So to tie into my back to life reality blues, Jerry returned today. I HONESTLY, can't complain one single itty bitty bit. We got 1 month together. Most families have 2 weeks. Even though the first 2 weeks were CRAZY, we still got some normal bits. Below are a few photos of our time together.

I will write soon, there is a lot to catch up on.

Sophia shortly became a Daddy's Girl. We are together on a boat at Lake Lure, NC (a.k.a Dirty Dancing movie was filmed here).

Harold L. (Whimpy) Mourn

Harold L. Whimpy Mourn has passed away. He died Friday night with family members including Jerry by his side.

Funeral Arrangements are a follows.

Cardaras Funeral Home in Nelsonville, Ohio

46 Faytte Street

Nelsonville, Ohio 45764

http://obit.cardaras.com/

Viewing is Tuesday from 2-4pm & 6-8pm

Funeral is Wednesday at 1pm

The obituary will be in the Columbus Dispatch & the Athens Messenger on Monday. Once Harold's information is added to the Cardaras Funeral Home website, you can log on and sign the guest book. Wife Janet & family are doing fine.

Update

At this moment there are just a few things to report.

-Hospice has brought in a bed, which we hope will make his father more comfortable. The Hospice nurses are very caring and helpful.

-Harold is grouchy and hard on his care givers. Thankfully, his caregivers have a lot of patience and there are a lot of family & friends rotating through the home.

-Their continues to be a lot of visitors and at this moment they are welcomed.

-Jerry is spending the days in Athens with his family. Sophia is with her Nanny's & I am working. Jerry spent the night on Monday, but last night he came home to spend with us.

-The Mourn Family Reunion on Sunday is cancelled.

-Sophia is winning the triple gold star for making her mom crazy! She is going to Nationals next. In fact, I think she will skip over the Nationals and go straight to the Olympics.
I can't put a finger on her tantrums and endless screaming. Here are my thoughts.
-She does not like Jerry and I together.
-She is testing Jerry to see if she will get any attention from him.
-Her eczema is itching and she is miserable.
*Today, I looked up a class at the Elizabeth Blackwell Center to see a Toddler/Parent class to dissect her behavior. Too bad they are not until September.

-At this time, I don't have vacation planned. We will see how things progress.

I will post more soon.

Emergency Leave

Jerry made the decision after talking with his family it was time to come home to be with his father. I called the Red Cross and Emergency leave was granted. Jerry was on the 1st flight home. He arrived at 10am Saturday and we drove to The Plains.

We did not share the news with his family in fear that their would be a flight delay, etc. So the house was filled with excitement to see him. Sophia for once was Chop Liver!

Q: How long will Jerry be home?
A: He has a 10 day leave and if needed can be extended to 20 days.

Q: What did Sophia think of Dad?
A: At 1st, she smiled and said he could come along but as the weekend pressed on, she WON the Blue Ribbon for making her parents miserable. Needless to say, she will be staying at home for the week with her normal caregivers.

Q: Why was Sophia so cranky?
A: I don't know, I am assuming that she does not like her mom showing affection to anyone but her.

Q: How is Jerry's Dad?
A: How do I say this.... He is in pain, uncomfortable, and in/out of consciousness. Mostly out. This weekend Hospice came into the home and Thankfully, the act of swallowing medicine is no longer a requirement. They have given Harold medicine that can be injected into the side of his mouth and adsorbed through the cheek. We are hoping the new medicine can hopefully help with the pain.

Q: Is Harold up for visitors?
A: There are a lot of people in/out of the home. At this time, the family is okay with visitors and they will let you know if the time is not right. Harold enjoys the conversation around him, likes for his back to be scratched and his hand held. He is not communicating.

Q: How do you get a hold of Jerry?
A: His old cell phone is turned on.

I will report more later.

Sophia's Weekend

Sophia & I had a busy weekend.....

I got away for one day to New Hampshire for our friend Nate Jacobs wedding, but I will write about that craziness another time, but I felt very Bridget Jones.

It was Kale's 1 year old B-day. He is the son to Angel & Jeremy who are fellow military officers of Jerry's. The other couple, I can't remember their name, so I will call them Carolyn's parents. The father is also in the military and the mother is my new BFF. (I guess not really if I can't remember their names, but I had a great connection with the family). Their daughter Carolyn is turning 1 this week and she was running all over the place, pushing everyone down, stealing other children's toys. I felt that Sophia had finally met her match.
Vroommmmmm.... You know, if I brought this toy to our home, she would not take to it or play with it. So, I am glad this huge toy is sitting in Jeremy & Angels living room.

This chair kept her occupied for maybe 2 minutes.

Play the video. You will see Sophia has the Mourn trucker in her.

Sophia and I went down to visit the Mourn Family on Sunday. Jerry's sister had arrived from Texas and they were having a neighborhood picnic. It seemed everyone on Harper Street came to enjoy fellowship. I would like just to give you a quick update on Harold's health. As I mentioned earlier he has been moved home to be cared by for family & friends. Swallowing is very difficult, so he is having trouble eating and taking medication. He also struggles to talk, so he is quiet and just likes to listen and take in other's conversation. Harold has many many visitors and sometimes it seems like there are too many, but it has always been this way at the Mourn home. Harold does not know a stranger. I think this is a Mourn trait, as his children are all the same, and so are the relatives. Below is a photo of Jerry's brother Michael with Sophia. It was hot on Sunday!!!

Report

Dear Friends and Family,

I have just two things to report & say.....

1. So, I wrote an interesting blog entry and letter to the editor. I hope you know that the entry was not a cry for help or complaint about the support I have received.

I wish I would of articulated more on was........ My talk with the military wives was a compiled list of all the kindness we received and a few hints on how we could use some additional help. The feelings/thoughts in the entry were not just mine. We all talked and praised our neighbors, church members, family and friends for their support. Every one of us had a story to tell about someones kindness. Please understand that we do appreciate your support to our soldiers and keep sending the cookies & notes to them.

So, I am hoping that I did not hurt any one's feelings. Sophia and I have been supported and loved by so many. I have ran out of thank you notes due to everyones kindness.


2. I feel it is necessary to touch on the health of Jerry's dad. Last week Harold was taken to Athens Hospital. He received wonderful care, and made the decision to be transferred to Lancaster hospital where he could be close to his cancer doctor. His cancer has spread and at this time Harold made the decision with his family and doctor to return home where he will receive care by his loved ones. This Saturday his daughter Janalee will be coming into town to spend the week with the family. Jerry is still planning his break for late August.

I am hoping my next entry can be on a more positive note.......

Letter to Editor

So very few newspaper articles evoke my emotion. However, on the 4th of July there was an article in the Columbus Dispatch in the Metro section about a lady sitting next to 2 soldiers on a plane who were going on their 2 week break and wanting to treat them to a pampering break. The soldiers told this travler that they missed the basic things like their own bathroom, shower, bed, etc. The article included a website where people could donate items, meals, services, ets for the soldiers leave.

While, I think this jesture is very kind, it evoked a very selfish feeling inside.... This selfish feeling I will share, becasue I am human and still angry. Here it goes..........

WHAT ABOUT THE FAMILY MEMBERS AT HOME LEFT TO WORK JUST AS HARD AND NEVER RECOGONIZED AS HERO'S OR RECEIVE SHINY METALS????

So this is what is so funny.... I spent Sophia's nap time on Saturday outlining my letter to the editor Ann & Sunday's Sophia's nap finishing it. Ha Ha! I can't believe, I wasted such precious time writing this letter. But it is sent and the damage is done. Here is my letter.

Hi Ann,

My name is Tiffanie Grove, and this is the first time that I have ever sent a letter in regards to an article. Last week, your article was on my door step which marked one of the many holidays apart from my husband and 1/2 way mark of his 2nd Military deployment with the National Guard.... It was a tough day, the weather was rainy, the sky was gloomy and our daughter was especially cranky. I had failed to make any kid friendly plans and I found this to probably be one of my loneliest and hardest days.

So.... I read your article and the desire to send a letter was almost immediate. However, I decided that I would wait a week and see if the feeling was still there. Then my neighbor brought me a copy of the article wanting to know if I read it....

I took this as a sign to drop you a note. I understand the story teller Melissa North's emotion of wanting to pamper the soldiers. Yes, they are making a huge sacrifice, their comforts are not available like to us at home. They do deserve a lovely, relaxing and stress free break.

However, there are other hero's and these are the military families and spouses at home. Their sacrifices are often not recognized or rewarded as Heroic. We are left working just as hard, pulling long work shifts, then pulling ALL the family shifts. We are mowing our lawns, making home repairs, taking every late night baby crying shift, dealing with difficult teenagers, paying the bills, getting food on the table, etc... We are exhausted as well, we also would like the opportunity to sleep in, shower more than 2 minutes, eat a meal in more than 2 seconds, go out to a restaurant, take a nap, watch a movies, go out alone, etc.

So I would like to make some suggestions as to how people who say they want to help, can help. There are so many different ways to help instead of sending a letter to the soldier or baking cookies. I can reassure you that if a Soldiers family is watched over, this is worth all the letters in the world or beef jerkey. Last night, I brainstormed with some soldiers wives as we swapped stories of help/no help and ideas. Here are our ideas.

-Don't just say to the family member, if you need some help give me a call and we will help. The correct approach is..... Hey, I would like to come over this weekend and mow your lawn or watch your children or make some repairs. Many of the family members don't mind asking for help, but it gets old and it's very difficult because we can't reciprocate at this time.

-Make the family at home a meal. Maybe organize a weekly/monthly meal with your neighbors.

-Let's say you have similar age child and maybe they are in the same activities... Offer to pick up/drop off the children. Or simply help the parent with getting the equipment out of the car (i.e. stroller, cooler, lawn> chair).

-Maybe their is a family member that has more than one child and they are struggling to get order, simply help round up the children, or get them settled at the table or church pew.

-If you offer to have the family over for dinner, make sure the parent gets to eat. So often they are getting their children settled, meeting the need of their children and then they don't get the opportunity to eat. Offer to hold the children or entertain while they eat in 2 seconds flat.

-Many times we are approached by local groups that say they want to do something for the soldiers. A different idea would be, offer to serve a meal to the family members and provide a childcare for the event. This would give the opportunity for the family members to have fellowship, talk and share what they are feeling. It is so very difficult to have fellowship when our children are running around.

So here are a few ideas. As it was reported in late 2007, their were approximately 2,000 Ohio/Michigan Soldiers deployed the 1st of January, 2008. This is the largest deployment since WWII. There are a lot of families in need of some extra help. Please know, your kindness will be payed forward!

Thanks Ann for hearing my story and suggestions. I don't claim to be a grammar guru, so please kindly overlook any mistakes. I would like to remain anonymous if any of the above is printed.

Sincerely,
Tiffanie Grove

Updates

A couple updates......

-Jerry's father was released from the hospital on Thursday of last week. His sodium level was up and he was sent home quicker than you can say medicare. He continues to never complain to a soul. We all know that he has such wonderful care & support by his children, brothers, sisters & friends. There always is a family member or friend near by to share a conversation with Harold. His wife Janet and daughter Jennifer take such good care of him, he is unconditionally loved by so many.

Now Sophia never forgets her grandpa. Even though she does not see him a lot, she never misses a beat with him, just curls up in his lap and loves him. You can see from the photos below, they are good buddies. This weekend, Jerry's cousins Rick, Laura & Gayle had a surprise B-Day/Welcome Home Party for their brother Bill. They were so kind to invite Sophia and I.

Harold's brother Mike picked him up from Athens and brought him to the party.

Bill is moving into his father's home. Bill, Rick, Laura & Gayle lost their father just 1 year old to a courageous battle with cancer. I think Dick Mourne spirit was there and probably enjoyed the fellowship and laughs. Even though, I did not know Dick very well.... there was a lot of talk about him and the fun always surrounded by him. He is loved dearly by so many.

Sophia & Grandpa Mourn.

Bill Mourn drinking from his beer goggles.

Sophia with 2nd Cousins.

I don't know what this face is, but she loved being on grandpa's lap.

Sophia with Great Uncle Mike & Great Aunt Bernadine

Sophia with Great Aunt Bernadine

-My next update is about my parents/family in Iowa. So many have asked if my parents were in harms way with all the tornadoes, floods, severe weather. Thankfully, they live in an area that has not been hit too hard. They do have friends in Parkersburg, Iowa who's home and business was destroyed with the Memorial Weekend tornadoes and have friends fighting the floods in Cedar Rapids. My mom mentioned there was a 10 minute storm with high winds that brought down some tree limbs in their yard and sadly killed 2 people when a tree fell on the front of a car. My mom summed it up yesterday when she said..... We are done with this crazy weather.

So a lot is going on in everyone's life..... I will keep you posted as I know more.

So, I am sure you are wondering if that little chunk Sophia walking yet.... The answer is No. She is standing in place, walking around furniture, up the walls, around the chair, but not from point A to point B. Everyone keeps telling me that once she starts walking my life will be all over. I find that very hard to believe because I think my life ended almost 13 months ago.

Somebody please answer me...... Why do couples have more than one child????? Who ever answers back with the best response will earn something very special from me......

My mom already told me, it's because people have sex, but I don't like that answer....

Ha Ha!

Busy Sophia

Blog Blog Blog Blog

Wow, keeping up the interest, creativity and desire to write in the blog is very hard! When I first started the blog, I thought it was fun and I could not wait to jot my feelings down. Now... It seems to be the last thing on my mind. Not to mention that I am still working out the anger faze...

I think I have taken a turn for the better. So let me tell you where this started.... I had a lovely PEO sister call me early in the AM and said Tiffanie I would like to have dinner with you and Sophia. Let's not make it complicated, lets have dinner together in a way that is convenient to you. So this lovely sister came to my house that evening and we shared dinner and memories together. This sister is a very strong woman and who has traveled the world extensively and also married to a man who was in the air force. I always love to hear her stories. Then she invited Sophia and I to spend Father's day with her family. Sophia and I biked up to their home in Worthington and spent the afternoon with her children and future daughters "in-laws". I am thankful for their support.

As I mentioned, I am feeling better. We have almost completed 1/2 of our time apart. July 2nd will be the 1/2 way point. And no, it has not gone fast. Your life may have flew by, but not for us. I miss my best friend, and I especially miss the extra pair of hands to help with Sophia and the home.

So enough about that... As you know my great neighbor and friend Tricia Arthur has been watching Sophia and her son Jackson since January. I feel like a MILLION BUCKS when I drop of Sophia at her home. I knew that Sophia would be loved like her own during their time together. However, good things must come to an end. Tricia, her hubby Scott, and Jackson are moving to Minnesota for Scott to pursue a position with the Mayo Clinic. I have truly enjoyed getting to know them and being their friend. Tonight, Scott had a surprise B-Day party for Tricia where he made a lovely speech about his bride. He captured it perfectly..... So I am going to quote him....."Everyone who comes into Tricia's life falls in love with her passion, sincerity, goodness and walks away wanting to be like her, so they try, share and pass it on". I will miss the Arthur family and she does make me want to pass on her goodness.....

I would like to give just a quick update on Jerry's Dad. Currently he is in ICU at the hospital in Athens. They are struggling to keep his Sodium levels up. Jerry's sister Jennifer had been a wonderful caregiver for the family. She has a strong medical background and does a wonderful job of communicating to the family the doctors words. We are very thankful for all that she does. I will let you know more as I learn more.

Jerry is doing good. He is just like his dad where he NEVER complains. He compares his conditions to standing next to the air conditioner unit on a 100 degree day. (Hot air being blown on you) They are having quite a sand storm which he understands could last up to 30 days. He is traveling a lot to the airport, which I think really helps break up the monotony. I have asked him to write an entry and let's see if he can get a moment to do it. We are going to have some time together in Sept.

Good Night.

Sophia is 1 Year Old

I can't believe it, but our daughter Sophia is 1 year old. This morning, she slept in until 9:30am, so if you ask me, she started the day out right. Grandma & Grandpa Grove came in for the weekend to help us out and celebrate the day with Sophia. She is going swimming with her Nanny today.

I know that I always talk about my neighbors and how great they are, but this Friday evening, they out did themselves and created a very special weekend for us. Gina & John hosted a surprise 1 year B-Day party for Sophia. The party was attended by the Rod, Rosie, John, Laura, Maria, Pete, Carene, Abbi, Gracie, John & Gina. Sophia was adorned with wonderful gifts and a tasty birthday cake. It was a great night. Thank you Olentangy neighbors for a great 1st Birthday.

Laura & Maria Bova, Sis and I

Who does she look like?

I don't know what this face is?

Carene, Abbi, Sis and I getting ready to blow out the candle.

Can you see Jerry? He is thin. He organized a Mobilization Run in Country. It was in coordination with the Armed Force Honor Run Memorial Day benefiting the "Greater Powell Veteran's Memorial. Check out the entry about Jerry's efforts and organization of the race.

http://www.premierraces.com/Races/MemorialDay.html

Damage Control

So, I have been thinking about my Saturday late night entry all day. Wondering.... Should I erase it, did anyone see it, what are people going to think, did Jerry read it? So, I decided today that I would share with Jerry that I was mad at him. His response was.... What did I do now?

As, I did a poor attempt of trying to tell Jerry why I was mad, I realized that I could not give one concrete, legit reason. What it boils down to is I am pissed about our situation.

So unfortunately, Jerry is the only tangible person related to my source of anger, thus this means I will be mad at him. Who else can I be mad at? As if being pissed at President Bush would do me a world of good.

It's late Sunday evening and I feel that my day was a waste. I spent a lot of the day crying, stressed about work on Monday, and not enjoying the day with Sophia. Thankfully a friend Tricia Zelenack had previously invited us to meet their new family addition Morgan. Sophia and I spent about an hour visiting with the family and catching up. I almost cancelled due to my attitude. It was probably just what we needed.

So, now that I found the source of my anger, does it mean that this part of the grieving process will be coming to a close???? I need to move on.

My next goal is to work on my exit strategy from the Fashion Industry. I have a personal goal of August to complete/make this decision. As everyone keeps telling me, I need to have a plan. I will work on the details and hopefully put my plan in action once Jerry gets home. Is it returning to Stenography school full time to finish my court reporting degree, or is it something completely different. I will be focusing my energy, praying for guidance, and probably bugging friends and family for their input as to what they see me doing.

Honesty

As I mentioned in the first blog, I am human and I was not going to sugar coat my thoughts, feelings or actions. So here it goes.... I am ANGRY. I feel rage that I can't explain or gain any sense of perspective. I can't make it go away. It's a poisonous feeling that I sure hope will leave soon.

I take it out mostly on Jerry when he calls, always communicating as little as possible, Or, I don't return calls to friends because I just can't say something nice. I do the least amount of communicating at work as possible, so I don't show the anger.

Every once in a while an unsuspecting Soul will ask me at the right moment "How I am doing" and I will try and communicate but it usually ends in tears and then I feel horrible that I dumped my shit on their plate. This just happened the other day, where I called a PEO sister & thanked her for sending me the summer schedule and I ended up crying on the phone to her. How embarrassing.

I HATE being a single parent, I HATE Jerry for leaving me behind to do everything. I don't even care that Jerry has a 3 person room, he is in 140 degree temperature, his feet are constantly covered in sand. That's what he deserves for leaving us.

As I write this, I can clearly see that I don't have a single lick of perspective. I will be ready for this part of the grieving process to leave my system. So, as you can tell, this is why I have not communicate via the blog.

There has been many great milestones in Sophia's life. She is crawling all over the place and very fast. She screams at the Opera pitch every time we walk up or down the front stairs. Sophia loves our cat Bernard and can see a dog in the park a mile away. She has 8 teeth and I think one of her back teeth are coming in. She is going to be 1 year old June 2nd. I just bought her a new car seat and she is facing forward and loving life in the car. Sophia's favorite foods are Pineapple, Sweet Potatoes, Pickles, Cheese, Cheese-its, and animal crackers. She still is the happiest baby and bald.

Low Expectations = Great Weekend

This was a very special weekend. Heidie my youngest sister was married to her long time friend Shu Tosaka. The days proceeding up to the event were rainy and cold. ...


Then the rain stopped, the sun came out and the temps warmed up. Their wedding was at the "Fountain's" in Glenwood, Iowa where the ceremony was outside and the reception inside a lovely ballroom on site. The ceremony was personal and captured the feelings of the couple.


The attendance from friends far and near was special. The best thing about your wedding day is that you are surrounded by all your favorite people on the same day who have laced in and out of your entire life.

Heidie's friends, Christie and I gave them their scrap book. You know what Heidie said..... Tiff, I read your blog, so I knew you were making us the scrap book. Can you believe that. Ha Ha!

It was a perfect weekend. Heidie and Shu looked beautiful and I am sure they are relieved their weekend has come to an end. In fact, I am sure my parents are glad as well. Last Grove girl to get married. Enjoy the photos below.

The Grove Family got the opportunity to talk with Jerry. Curtis (my brother in law married to Christie) told Jerry he was sending a care packet of Porn and Beer. Jerry really did not get the joke. Dad talked to Jerry about the weather, Sister Christie described Sophia to him. He got an ear full. His presence was really missed by everyone, especially me.

Dad, Heidie & Mom
Long time family friend Donald, who flew from Lancaster, Penn with wife Judy.

Heidie with BFF"s Brandee, Jamie & Jenny

Our flowers.

Dad, having fun at the reception.

Shu's Mom and Sister who flew in from Tokoyo, Japan for the wedding.

Shu's boutonniere.

Heidie & Shu cutting the cake.